My friend Seth Schoen rewrote the story of creation using words starting only with B. He was inspired by other versions, using A and S. I thought it so clever that I asked him if I could publish it here. He graciously agreed, so here you go!
Beginnings
1:1. Blessed Being began by building blue bowl, bottom base.
2. Bottom base bore blurriness, blankness. Blackness beset benthic
border. Blessed Being breathed by benthic border.
3. Blessed Being bade: “Brightness, be!” Brightness became.
4. Blessed Being beheld brightness’s beauty. Blessed Being bade
brightness balance blackness.
5. Bout between blackness, brightness: basic breadth.
6. Blessed Being bade: “Border between bowl, basin—be! Benthic basin,
become below blue bowl’s breathable bailiwick.”
7. Blessed Being built basin beneath bowl. Border became, bowl
bestriding basin.
8. Bout between blackness, brightness: basic breadth.
9. Blessed Being bade: “Basalt, border brine!” Basalt became bare
bedrock.
10. Blessed Being beheld bedrock’s beauty.
11. Blessed Being bade barren bedrock bloom. Bedrock budded, bloomed,
bore berries.
12. Blooms, branches, boughs (baobabs, bananas, bamboo) became. Blessed
Being beheld beauty, blessed blooming.
13. Bout between blackness, brightness: basic breadth.
14. Blessed Being bade: “Blazing balls, be! By becoming blatant beacons,
be Big Ben’s bells’ briskness’s basis; betoken banquets, biennials,
bicentenaries, bissextiles.
15. Become biosphere’s bright bulbs.” Blazing balls became.
16. Blessed Being bestowed both biggest balls’ burdens: Blazing (bigger)
ball became brightness’s boss; brilliant big ball, blackness’s boss.
Besides, black bowl’s baby bright balls became boundless.
17. Blessed Being bestowed blazing balls’ bearings. Biosphere, beneath,
became brighter.
18. Brightness/blackness balance became better. Blessed Being beheld
blazing balls’ beauty.
19. Bout between blackness, brightness: basic breadth.
20. Blessed Being bade: “Briny beings (barracudas, bass, bonito), be!
Birds (bluebirds, bobolinks, buzzards), be!”
21. Blessed Being built briny beings by billions, built birds. Blessed
Being beheld beings’ beauty.
22. Blessed Being blessed briny beings, bidding: “Briny beings, become
bountiful, breed! Birds, besides, become bountiful!”
23. Bout between blackness, brightness: basic breadth.
24. Blessed Being bade: “Beasts (bears, badgers, baboons), be!” Beasts
became.
25. Blessed Being built beasts, breed by breed. Blessed Being beheld
beasts’ beauty.
26. Blessed Being bade: “Becoming, by Blessed Being’s basic blueprint,
befits brainy beings; being baser beings’ bosses befits brainy beings.”
27. By Blessed Being’s blueprint, Blessed Being built both brainy
beings’ bodies—bridegroom’s body, bride’s body.
28. Blessed Being blessed both, bade both: “Become bountiful, bear
babies, bespread biosphere, bridle beasts, be birds’, blooms’, beasts’
bosses!”
29. Blessed Being bade: “Behold, blooms’ berries, buds, boughs become
brainy beings’ bread.
30. But beyond brainy beings—berries become birds’, breathing beasts’
bread, besides.” By Blessed Being’s bidding, beasts began biting
berries.
31. Blessed Being beheld boundlessly beautiful beings built by Blessed
Being’s behest. Bout between blackness, brightness: basic breadth.
2:1 Biosphere: built. Beings: built.
2. Blessed Being braked biosphere-building business, began break.
3. Blessed Being blessed break’s bout between blackness, brightness:
because beforementioned break bounded Blessed Being’s biosphere-building
burdens.
Ok, language skills!! Wow! It does show how direct the story is, doesn’t it?